Monday, October 31, 2011

No Muse is Good Muse

No Muse is Good Muse

Bring us in, Optimus!  We open on Doom and Merla plotting with Haggar.  They're testing a new ultra-robeast on a copy of Voltron.  Despite the somewhat bland and tepid coloring job, this faux Voltron looks kind of cool--in a Transformers: the Movie sort of way.  The robeast defeats the faux Voltron by freezing and stomping on him.

A skull ship lands on a Galaxy Garrison planet, claiming to be crewed by the muses of norn.  The Garrison officer lands his ship and is communicated to telepathically.  Apparently, telepathy changes his uniform color.  The muses hand over Merla.

The officer tells his superiors at Galaxy Garrison that they'll only turn Merla over to a high-ranking official.

Merla and Allura are reminiscing about their childhood together.  Huh?  Today is the eclipse of Alfor.  Meanwhile, GG calls Bandor launches a fleet from Pollux.  He meets the muses (and apparently his men can afford GG uniforms now instead of the togas).  Oh, look., the head muse is actually Haggar.  They capture Bandor.  Lotor's fleet destroys his via stock footage. 

Galaxy Garrison decides to interrupt the Spartans' Arusians' festival. to ask for help.  Then Lotor and Merla get into an argument.  Back on Doom, some . . . dudes are arguing about who's going to knock Zarkon off the throne with Zarkon right there.

Pidge tells the team that Bandor is in trouble.  They launch in the lions.  They arrive on the planet to find Bandor outnumbered.  Bandor himself is planning an escape, though his men are pessimistic.  Then the lions arrive and engage Lotor's fleet.  Guess who wins?  It's actually a pretty protracted affair.  With a lot of stock footage padding.  Then they form Voltron.  They charge Lotor's ship.  Lotor sets course for the Norn sun.

He leads them into the heart . . . of . . . the sun?!  And only he knows the way out.  One of the robot ships tumbles off the path, but Lotor leads the rest of his ships out a secret space warp--so secret we don't even see it animated.  And Voltron is getting cooked. 

Then a crazy bird robeast appears and makes some Filmation bird sound effects.  It damages Voltron with a halberd attack to the back.  Merla and Haggar are somehow watching all this from the planet.  They block an axe strike with the spinning laser blades, and then use the solar arrows because that's all that will work in the heat.  Volts forms a giant glowing bow and implaes the robeast.  The explosion hurls Voltron out of the sun and back to the planet.  In a cheaply animated sequence.  Voltron lands.

Merla mocks Voltron and unleashes the robeast she'd been testing earlier.  He's a lot taller than Voltron.  And he's got the good ol' standard robeast growl.  Voltron charges and the robeast fires it's freeze ray.  Boring.  Voltron is covered in ice.  The robeast launches spikes out of its hair.  I've seen other redheads do this, too.  Pincushioned, Voltron collapses and the robeast closes in as Bandor and the GG crew watch in dismay. 

Allura is sad that they'll be defeated on the day of her father's eclipse.  The moon blocks the sun (huh, apparently, it's an eclipse that happens on EVERY PLANET AT THE SAME TIME).  Haggar sees it as a bad omen.  Allura "feels the energy of the eclipse" and the ice melts.  Hello, Deus ex Machina.  Voltron forms the blazing sword and absorbs solar power.  The robeast doesn't stand a chance.  Instead of stabbing or slicing, Voltron opts for the flambe.  Lotor says it was luck.  Haggar and Merla are stuck in the space coffin together.

Back on Doom, the two . . . guys from earlier report the defeat of Lotor and Merla to Zarkon.  Zarkon laughs and gloats.  Voltron leads the GG fleet.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Lotor . . . My Hero?

Lotor  . . . My Hero

Optimus Prime brings us in to Doom with a tone poem about vultures, greed, and envy.  Merla is giving Zarkon a back rub.  And then Haggar takes over and Zarkon freaks out and talks about how he can't remember when Haggar was beautiful because his memory only goes back a thousand years.  And Lotor is waiting in the wings to take the throne.

On Arus, a woman has asked the Voltron force to help her suddenly fever-ridden mother, who was apparently cursed the day before by Haggar in the form of her red-dress wearing self from Fleet of Doom.  And the only cure for the accursed fever is a flower that only blooms once every thousand years, and there's only one.  Oh, and Alfor ex Machina is the one who tells Allura about the Cadmium flower. 

The team takes a hover-bumper-car back to the castle with Sven with the flower they've somehow found in five seconds.

Lotor sharpens his "stun-sword" and sneaks up on Zarkon, but is caught.  And then he tries to claim it was all a game.  Lotor is imprisoned with some goofy hissing centipedes.  Lotor sweats.  Zarkon tells him the millipedes (my mistake) can chew through steal.  They chase him around the cell, and then they chew a way to freedom for Lotor.

Everyone at the Castle of Lions is waiting for the Cadmium flower to bloom.  And it does it in style.  They wait for it to open into a real flower.  Pidge finds Cheddar building a house to protect the flower.  Then the mice trip.  Silly mice.

Zarkon lands his blue flagship in a ravine right on planet Pollux.  Haggar introduces him to new robeast material.  Some Polluxian scouts are watching.  And then Haggar looks at the Cadmium flower in her crystal ball, and sends the cat to disrupt things.  The flower opens, and the blue cat charges the mice and steals the flower.  The team--and the mice--pursue.  They don't catch the cat.  There's much weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth.  Haggar takes off in her space coffin.  Keith orders the team to follow her.  They launch the lions.

Haggar leads the Voltron force away while Zarkon plans to launch an attack from Pollux.  Sven and his men stage a commando raid while Bandor goes to warn the Voltron force.  The Voltron force peels away from their pursuit of Haggar and Sven and his men disable robots and commandeer a skull tank to destroy the Doom Base.  Zarkon is pissed.  Haggar says she'll be right on her way.

Bandor blows things up with a slingshot.  A Doom fighter chases him.  Sven blows up the horribly miscolored monstrosity with his tank.  Then reinforcements arrive and disable Sven's tank.  The lions show up and perform horribly miscolored attacks on the Doom forces. 

Zarkon tosses a millipede in his robeast super-sizer.  It turns into a robeast only Floro Deiry could love.  Then Haggar arrives and starts ordering the robeast around.  It takes red lion out of the sky.  Green and yellow lions launch weapons at it, then Keith launches the lion wing attack from right over Haggar.  The robeast disables black lion with a flamethrower, then grows new claws or something in another poorly animated scene and throws green lion around.

Haggar shows Zarkon the Cadmium flower.  Then she goes on the ultrawave and taunts Coran, Allura (HOW THE CRAP ARE THEY BACK ON ARUS SO FAST) and the daughter.  Zarkon and Haggar destroy the flower.  Oh, but Keith, Pidge, Hunk and Lance are still on the planet.  I guess Allura didn't go with them?  I totally didn't notice.  The guys start fighting Doom soldiers on the ground.  Keith is about to get smooshed by the millepede robeast, but then an identical robeast starts fighting it.  The two robeasts destroy each other.

Then Lotor shows up.  A moment that could have been awesome is ruined by Zarkon quipping that he never should have given Lotor the keys to the spaceships.  Lotor declares war on his father.

Allura apologizes to Deborah (oh, that was her name) and suddenly Cadmium flowers bloom out of nowhere.  Alfor tells them they were borne from the love they all share. The mice make a potion out of it.  Deborah's mother is revived by it. 

This episode actually has sooo much potential, but it falls apart thanks to a bunch of poorly explained, rushed-seeming sequences and some of the worst animation of even this second season.

Friday, October 28, 2011

With Friends Like You

With Friends Like You

Optimus Prime tells us the Omega Comet from the first season is the Phylos Comet.  Coran explains to everyone the Phylos is a planet withe eliptical orbit of a comet (hello, Halley's comet tie-in) and it will be passing close to Arus.  While Pidge and Lance discuss how scary the life forms may be, a skull tank approaches.  The tank lands under the white flag.  Guards in Air Team uniforms hold the pilot at gunpoint, but Allura frees him.  He introduces himself as Count Zane, and explains that Lotor is building a temple and weapons on the Phylos comet.

Lotor is toasting to his temple of Allura when Zarkon arrives and arrests him.  Zarkon's flagship looks like his first season ship, but blue instead of red.  Lotor protests his arrest and demonstrates his new weapons systems--missiles with anti-lazon warheads.  Zarkon is not impressed.  Zarkon unveils his herculean generator.  Which looks like a mechasnail.  The mechasnail generates tornadoes.

On Arus, Zane explains the Herculean Snail Generator to the team.  He shows a recording of a prototype, and Pidge also says it looks like a snail.  Hunk describes it as working like a giant food processor.  The comet is only hours away.

On Phylos, Lotor is examining the Herculean generator.  But he is skeptical.  Zarkon as arranged for Merla to attack a GG fleet and send an SOS to Voltron.  The fleet commander looks like Okita from Yamato.  The four remaining ships of the fleet follow Merla to Phylos and get ambushed.  Soon, only the flagship is left and it crashes.  They send a distress signal to Castle Control.

Coran receives the distress signal, and Keith starts to run to the boarding chutes.  Zane offers to go, but Lance (as usual) is skeptical.  Zane gets all teary-eyed and appeals to Allura.  She allows him to go.  Zane leads them through a secret path as the lions follow his flying tank.  Lance is still skeptical.  Zane tells Keith to rescue the ship while he attacks the Herculean generator.  Keith sends green., yellow, and red lions with Zane while he and Allura fly to the caverns in which the GG ship is trapped, still under fire by Merla's forces. 

Merla watches the lions approach.  They destroy the robot fighters.  Merla flees, and black and blue lions (the bruise formation) escort the ship out of the bottomless pit and then go to join the others.

Zane and the lions are approaching Zarkon's missile base.  Zane breaks off to destroy the missiles and sends the lions after the Herculean Generator, to Lance's objections.  He attacks the missile base and points out the Herculean Snail's position before they lose sight of him and write him off as KIA.

Coran calls them to warn them that Phylos is getting close to Arus and threatening them with stock footage of the Omega Comet.  Then the lions fly into a minefield and black lion is knocked out of the sky.

The lions land as Keith gets black lion upright.  They wonder how Zane was so wrong. . .

Lotor, Haggar, and Zarkon thank Zane as he approaches the throne.  And, of course, Zarkon goes back on his word and won't actually give Zane rule of Phylos.  Haggar zaps him with her cane and he collapses on the floor.  Zarkon orders the Herculean generator activated as robots carry Zane out of the room.

The lions are picking their way through the minefield when the Herculean Generator tornado hits them and they fly around in the minds amidst explosions.  Then they form Voltron.

They drop below the range of the generator.  Haggar is in the control cab and she drops the tornado lower . . . but Voltron forms the blazing sword and destroys the generator.  Haggar stumblies out of the generator wreckage and summons a robeast.  It launches missiles and then it's steer horns at Voltron.  It actually has a decent roar for once.  And they hit it with the lion torches and then the blazing sword.  Too bad.  That was one of the better robeasts in the new season.

Zarkon's flagship is moving to escape.  Keith is ready to pursue, but Coran warns them of the missiles Lotor is readying.  Lotor gives the order for them to fire.  Coran launches the Flying Fortress to intercept the missiles.  Er, no, they just evade the missiles while they melt everything.  Coran knows they can rebuild and replant.  Then Keith destroys Lotor's old, first season command ship.  Huh.  Lotor flees in an escape ship. 

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Doom Girls on the Prowl

Doom Girls on the Prowl

Arus is having a parade.  Led by guys in blue Robin, the boy wonder costumes.  With no pants.  Everyone marvels at their own likenesses.  Except Lance, Pidge and Hunk feel left out that they didn't get their own statues.  Coran boosts Allura to the top of a pedestal with Keith and things get awkward.  Then some girls throw flowers to Allura.

Merla is watching this stuff from Zarkon's throne.  Haggar sends a pink baby woodtick robeast after Merla, but her pet vulture throws the woodtick on Haggar.  Merla threatens to feed it to her vulture.  Haggar offers to help her defeat Voltron, but Merla calls her magic obsolete. 

Pink Doom robots with horrible processed voices pilot Doom fighters to Arus alongside Merla and Haggar in the star cutter.  The fighters destroy the Arusiann parade statues and some flags, and stampede the people into a panic.  Allura and Keith lead them back to the castle.

Pidge, Hunk and Lance are sprinting to the castle while Keith, Coran, and Allura lead thousands of villagers to the coverless bridge.  Then, the Doom fighters start strafing the road.  The yellow, green, and red lions launch and engage the fighters.  Keith and Allura resume leading the villagers while the other guys land to help.

Haggar and Merla bandy words back and forth.  Haggar finally releases her woodtick and supersizes it.  Oh, it's more like a flea than a tick now.  It launches and knocks the lions off a cliff and buries them.  Then it freezes Lance, Pidge and Hunk.  *yawn.*

Allura hears the attack, but Keith insists they keep moving.

Haggar brags about their solar ice.  And Lance's uniform is miscolored red.  The fighters now have reinforcements and continue strafing things at random.  Merla orders them to shoot down the rest of the statues.

Arusian refugees are gathered in the castle.  Keith tells Allura that they can't reach the others.  Coran says this is the worst attack since Alfor's defeat.  Really?  It's just a bunch of ships flying around shooting statues.  What about the time all the surface water on the planet was evaporated?  Remember that?  That was pretty bad.

Merla and Haggar mount their attack on the castle, and Coran declares it a fight to the finish.  Keith and Allura launch in their lions, using stock footage from their very first launchenings.

The robeast attacks the castle.  The castle defenses are destroyed.  Black and blue lions attack the robeast, but their weapons are useless and it catches them in a net.  Merla and Haggar gloat.  The pink Doom robots walk around and shoot things.  The skull tanks launch missiles at deserted buildings.

Coran and the mice cry because he can't find the other Voltron force members.  Oh, one of the mice knows where they are.  The mice lead Coran through a secret passage to where the three guys are frozen.  Aaand the robeast freezes Coran and the mice.  And then Keith, Allura, and everyone in the castle.  Keith and Allura find a way to counteract the ice.  And they exchange positrons or something.  And then they fire missiles at each other.  Which somehow frees them from the net.  They use a sonic noise attack that makes the robeast explode.  Huh.  No Voltron or blazing sword.  Then everyone defrosts and they get back into their lions. 

They form Voltron.  vVoltron destroys the skull tanks and the Doom fighters after standing still and getting shot for a few seconds.  Then they use the lion torches to burn . . . down . . . the Arusian buildings the Doom robots are shooting at them from?  Oookay.

Merla blames Haggar and they flee. 

Voltron rebuilds the castle.  Pidge wonders if they'll have their own statues.  Then some kids build their own statues and float.  Allura is in the tomb talking to ALfor, who is complimenting their bravery.  And apparently Alfor approves of Keith.  Um, so is their whole thing officially a  . . . thing, now?

Gods, this episode was painful.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

To Soothe the Savage Robeast

To Soothe the Savage Robeast

Optimus Prime starts us off with a realtor's spiel of Arus.  And we pan into a house with a woman playing a harp and thinking about her lost . . . husband?  Boyfriend?  His name is Ro, in any event.  She flashes back to Doom slavers capturing Arusians as slaves.  She and Ro try to escape the robots on a boat, but Ro is captured. 

On Doom, robot overseers are commanding slaves to do things with stones.  Ro is carrrying a wicker bast full of jewels, which he drops in exhaustion.  In Castle Doom, Lotor marries Merla, with Zarkon officiating.  Hurgh, is this disturbing.  And Merla does some mind control stuff.  Doom robots and Merla's fish speakers cheer.  Merla is already plotting to take Zarkon's throne--after she conquers Arus, naturally.

Haggar is moving through the slave quarters, looking for Ro from Arus.  She finds him.  And has Merla's scheme in mind.

Taryn is out collecting honey from her bee hives when Ro appears.  They collapse in the grass in joy.  Then Merla and a barely-disguised Haggar appear, and Ro introduces them as his "new friends."  AND THEY RUN A FOUNDATION FOR NEEDY SPACE CADETS!  Merla gives Taryn a pitcher of DEATH to deliver to Keith because Merla is in love with him and completely shy.  And EVIL.  So Taryn and Ro deilver it to Allura, and Taryn gives her the completely suspicious cover story, and Allura is a little suspicious and jealous.  She calls Keith for his birthday party.

Keith doesn't hear her call because he's MILES AWAY picking flowers on the cliffside.

Ugh.  Taryn's voice actress' delivery is straight out of Leave it to Beaver--that annoying coached dialect from 50s and 60s television.  She plays her harp for Ro and he has a flashback to his time as a slave and is overcome with guilt and explains that bad stuff is going to happen.  So they decide to warn the castle. 

Haggar ambushes them on the way to the castle with a . . . magical tree root that breaks the wheel.

Allura is still brooding over Keith's secret admirer while they all sit around the food-laden table and wait for Keith.  Nanny pours out of the pitcher of death, and Lance convinces him to wait for Keith.

Keith for some reason stops at a house, and Lotor steps out.  Lotor warns Keith of Merla's plot.  I like this development with Lotor that's been going on in the past couple episodes.  Even though it goes completely against his first season characterization.

Hunks toasts Keith while the mice scare each other.

Haggar watches this on her crystal ball, and sees Taryn and Ro with their wheel fixed.  Merla sends robots on robot horses after them.  The horses are closing in and Ro prepares to throw FLAMING EXPLOSIVE BARRELS THAT THEY JUST HAPPENED TO HAVE IN THE BACK OF THE CART.  Keith sees the chase and rides to the rescue.  The robots shoot the wheel off, then Keith arrives and drives them off.

Coran is STILL TOASTING and they're about to taste DEATH IN A PITCHER when the mice spill it on some flowers and the flowers disintegrate.  Hunk throws his glass on the fire and the flames turn blue.  They run outside and find Taryn and Ro and their horse.  And Keith.  Once again the day is saved.  And Keith and Allura have a completely platonic romantic moment.  And Zarkon's fighters strafe them.  And Taryn is going to be okay in a hospital bed.  And they ride their ziplines to the lions. 

The lions, um, run around while they get strafed by the fighters.  Then black lion detaches its wings AND ITS HEAD and destroys some fighters.  Haggar tells her crystal ball to destroy them all.  Things get cloudy and lightning-y, and another shitty robeast appears.  They form Voltron. 

They fight in a completely incomprehensible montage of scenes, but then they form blazing sword and are saved by stock footage.  Oh, and this robeast . . . runs on lava?  Wha--?

Lotor confronts Merla on a bridge over a canyon on Arus.  This is another kind of interesting development in an episode that is overall stupid.  Merla casts her marriage bracelet into the canyon.  then optimus Pirime tells us the moral of the story.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

A Ghost of a Chance

A Ghost of a Chance

Optimus Prime brings us in to Planet Doom with a little Space Poetry.  Cossack is wondering where Merla comes from, and Haggar says she can control minds.  Zarkon mocks both of them, and then gets his mind controlled by Merla.  He puts her in charge of conquering Arus.  Zarkon, Lotor, Cossack, and Haggar all enter Merla's Space Cutter to see her quark-filled cosmotron.  Which runs on charmed quarks.  She puts Cossack in the gizmo and it's basically an agony booth.  Except it's also a Outer Limits "teleport you to PAIN" machine.

In Haggar's lab, Cossack complains to Haggar.  Haggar muses on her mental powers, and the fact that Merla's been reading Allura's mind.

On Arus, people are doing things.  Optimus Prime tells us about rumors.  Apparently the Arusians have been hearing about the ghost of Alfor returning at the valley of Zohar.  They all go to the remote location to look at the monuments.  And apparently Alfor and Zarkon had a duel here.  And then Merla designed as Nanny's character model tells them that he's coming back.  I mean, seriously, isn't it obvious?  She leads them into the rainbow caves where they find Alfor's golden shield. 

The Voltron force discusses the rumors.  Allura hopes it's true.  And the Voltron force are her best friends.  Then the townspeople rush to the castle to tell her about the golden shield of Alfor in the rainbow caves in the Valley of Zohar.  *pant*  Then Pidge rushes to tell Keith that Allura's gone there alone.

Allura runs past the monument and Merla watches, and then takes off her disguise.

Allura finds the gold shield and a statue of her father, and then a meteor (?!?) hits the ground and Keith knocks her to the ground.  The rest of the team tells them of the meteor and find phony gold fragments from the busted shield.  And then the meteor blocks the cave entrance.  The team tries to push it open.  They open it far enough for Allura to fit through, but a rockfall blocks Pidge from following her.  She leaves to get help. 

The meteor takes flight and then explodes to reveal Merla's star cutter.  She gloats.  It's like a terminal disease.  On her way to the castle, Allure sees the star cutter fire on the castle.  Coran orders the castle defenses to return fire, but the star cutter deals severe damage to the castle and robots enter the castle.  Merla rides up next to Allura in a skull tank and captures her.  Allura mocks her lipstick.  Then Lotor arrives.

Lotor, Cossack, and Hagger invite themselves in, and Merla tells Allura that Lotor wears shoulder pads under his uniform.  Merla takes Allura to the Comsotron.

Coran is stunned by robots invading castle control.  The team is still struggling to move the boulder, but Pidge finds a Pidge-sized tunnel and escapes.  Merla has Allura in the cosmotron and turns it on.

Allura is agonized by the cosmotron.  Lotor is disturbed.  He finally draws his sword and threatens Merla, forcing her to release Allura.  The mice have snuck into the star cutter.  Lotor comforts Allura and Merla tries to mind-control him, but he's too besotted by Allura.  Merla sends her Fish Speakers somewhere, Lotor leaves the room, and the mice steal Merla's cloak while one awakens her and they escape.  Cossack and Haggar watch her leave and laugh.  They mock Merla.

Following Pidge's passage, they find a painting of King Alfor leading the Lion Knights against Zarkon.  His ghost appears and he teleports the team to their lions.

Allura jumps into the lake to swim to her lion.  Alfor appears and teleports her into blue lion.  The lions launch.  Merla watches the lions launch as Cossack, Lotor, and Haggar watch.

The team converges on the star cutter and forms Voltron.  They fire stingray missiles and the insignia crest at the star cutter.  Merla orders her dwarfling Fish Speakers to launch the robeast.  Cossack asks Hagga how Merla got it if she'd hidden the keys.  Then, the red and yellow chicken-gator robeast arrives and fires darts out of its beak at Voltron, then grabs him and starts electrocuting Voltron.  Allura identifies an arc-field generator, and they arc it back at him with the insignia crest.  Then they form the blazing sword while the robeast gets spikey.  Despite its spikes, it gets blowed up.  Lotor flees in his first season command ship.

The team, with Coran, admires the painting of Alfor defeating Zarkon.  Then we get a PSA about rumors.

Either I'm mellow today, or this episode isn't as bad as some of the other second season ones have been.  I like the Alfor-mythology they hint at here (and with Stryde in the last episode), and as silly and "standard American Cartoon" bumbling Haggar, Cossack, and Lotor have gotten, I kind of like their rivalry with Merla.  Oh, well.  Tomorrow's episode will probably piss me off like the others.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Enter Merla, Queen of Darkness

Enter Merla, Queen of Darkness

For some reason, in the time between seeing this as a sprout and indulging in it in my adultolescence, I thought this was the first new episode.

Optimus Prime tells us that Zarkon is amassing a new army with new allies: Merla and Stryde the Tiger Fighter.  Haggar asks him about it, but he's vague.

Meanwhile, on Arus, the team is reusing the Judo footage from the forest fire episode.  And hilarity ensues.  And a lot of mentions of the space academy.  And a decent loophole to mention the Astro-Knights, and the Tiger Fighters.  Guess who'll we be meeting in the next scene, kiddies?

A Tiger ship encroaches on Doom airspace and Cossack arms the snake lasers while Zarkon looks on, amused.  The tiger fighter fights it's way through the defenses, humiliating Cossack.  His tiger's mecha design is pretty cool for this being a second season episode.  At least Anatole Leonard won't be wondering where his mecha went.  Unfortunately, the color choices for Stryde's uniform isn't so good . . .  Zarkon and Stryde trade words, and Zarks convinces him that Arus now threatens his honor.  Stryde's father had fought alongside King Alfor in the last generation.

Lotor mocks Zarkon's new plan.  Zarkon gives him the "be on your best behavior for our guests" talk.

A fleet of ships land on planet Doom, and Cossack wonders who they all are.  And then Merla arrives and controls everyone with her telepathy.  And Lotor likes how people bow.  And there's a confrontation between Lotor and Merla.  Her henchmen look like rejected Lunattacks from the later Thundercats episodes.  Merla also is upset that Stryde will get all the glory for vanquishing the Voltron force.  She's puts the wammy on him and convinces him to let her go help, along with the new ultra-robeast.

Castle Control alerts the team to the arrival of Stryde.  Allura recognizes him, and challenges them.  Keith accepts.  They break black lion out of the lion statue again (?!) and Keith launches.

They meet among some asteroids.  Keith tries one last time to get out of the hostilities, but Stryde starts the fight.  They trade shots.  Pidge and Hunk are all set to interfere, but Keith turns the tables on Stryde with his harpoon.  The two mecha animals charge each other.

Merla is watching and decides to get rid of both of them. 

Black lion crashes into the tiger fighter and they both crash on the asteroid.  The lions and Merla follow.  Keith and Stryde have emerged from their mecha and face each other with swords.  Stryde has Keith at swordpoint, and then his code of honor wins out and he stops the fighting.  They're about to part ways when Merla appears.  Her lady elven shock troops surround them.  Fortunately, the lions intervene just in time.  Stryde and Keith run to their mecha.  Merla takes off in her star cutter and releases the robeast.

The lions and tiger are leaving the asteroid field when they're ambushed by the robeast mutant turtle.  Stryde holds the robeast off, but the team forms Voltron.  They form the blazing sword pretty much right away.  Wow, that was fast.  The robeast explodes and Merla leaves in disgrace.  And she threatens her dwarf. 

Allura bandages Stryde, and Keith acts all designated flyer.  Keith tries to convince him to join the Galaxy Garrision, but Stryde is all not so fast.

One of my friends and I were both surprised to realize that Stryde wasn't introduced until now.  Apparently, he seemed so badass when we were 8 that he had to have come from the good season of Voltron.  Oh well.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Who's Flying the Blue Lion and the Return of Sven

Who's Flying Blue Lion and the Return of Sven

Ships crowd their way over the horizon.  Optimus Prime tells us they're the unstoppable spider, shark and pterodactyl ships from the rogue galaxy, in league with Zarkon, invading the planets of the Galaxy Alliance.  Space Marshall Graham calls for a inter-galactic conference.  Ships land at the Galaxy Garrison headquarters, along with the lions.  They discuss the futility of resistance.  And then they show up and attack earth right in the middle of the conference.  Largo, king of the rogue galaxy, calls the Galaxy Garrison and threatens the alliance by crashing a ceramic apple.  Most of the Alliance members are in favor of surrender.  Keith and Coran try to rally them to resist. 

They launch two new stingray fighters--that look a lot like the old stingray fighters.  And they get trashed by Lotor's ships underwater.  He fires magnabeams and covers garrison island in a forcefield.  Then a whole lot of disjointed animation represents the attack--some from the Drule raid on GG, some from other second season episodes, and some random stuff.

The Voltron force rushes to their lions.  Outside, Garrison troops are mounting a desperate holding action against the robots.  The Voltron force are cut off by robots.  Then more alliance troops appear and hold off the robots long enough for them to get to the lions.  They launch and smash a few robots.

Lotor's flagship is hovering over the flaming island.  He, Cossack, Haggar, and a detachment of robots take some shuttle thing into the Garrison conference room.  Cossack begs Lotor to let him do the threatening.  Sven sneaks off to the parking garage and disables the robots guarding the ships.  Two more robots have him at gunpoint, but black lion rescues him. 

Cossack warns Lotor of the lions' rampage.  Then, Lotor presents the leaders of the Alliance planets, including Graham and Coran as hostages.  Lotor bargains the hostages for Allura.  And starts whipping Coran.  He tells Allura to keep resisting--then passes out.  The team debates, and they decide to surrender.  Those are some neat elevators they've got coming out of the lions' ears.  Allura leaves her lion and Lotor salivates all over himself. 

Allura begs Lotor not to hurt Coran, though Cossack wants to shoot him.  He and Cossack take the shuttle over to black lion and demand Keith to get out.  Keith springboards onto the head of the lion after seeing Sven.  Sven--at the head of a contingent of Garrison troops, shoots down most of the robots.  Pidge, Hunk, and Lance get in their lions.  We see blue lion's doors close, but Allura is still on the ground.

Pidge and Lance have to make it real obvious for the kids in the audience that Sven is in blue lion.  With the original team together, they destroy robot fighters thanks to three minutes of footage cut from some really early episodes of the first season. 

Allura is back in Castle Control, in her Disney princess dress, and tells them they got away from Lotor and Lotor and Cossack are fleeing.  But Hags is still there, and she summons--a doofy-looking preying mantis robeast.  They form Voltron.

The robeast approaches some civilians(?) on the ground.  Voltron fires the lion torches, then machinegun pods, and the eyebeams, Then Sven suggests they grab him.  So they clothesline him into a building, form the blazing sword, and close in with more stock footage.  Then it grabs Voltron by the head with its mandibles and Haggar casts some sort of Electrocution spell.  Then Pidge grabs a power lion and turns the tables on the robeast and Voltron deals its mortal blow.  Then Haggar flees in the space coffin. 

The space leaders of the rest of the Galaxy planest are inspired by this victory, and we see the old destroyers from Dairugger fighting the spider ships.  Then Voltron joins in and destroys some MORE robot fighters in old footage.  Largo, the rogue leader, gets scared and leaves.  Then Voltron poses in front of Earth.

Friday, October 21, 2011

War and Peace . . . and Doom!

War and Peace . . . and Doom!

Optimus Prime starts us off with his narration of Castle Doom.  Cossack is telling Zarkon about a warlike planet called Oron (rhymes with moron) that is leaving the Galaxy Alliance.  Cossack likes their military buildup.  The planet is ruled by some dude named Kruger who doesn't like Voltron.  Haggar is sure that she can manipulate him.  Zarkon sends them to conquer the planet for the arsenal.

Roland, a government official from Oron, calls Space Marshall Graham to tell him about the decision to leave Galaxy Garrison.

Coran awakens the force and they meet in Caste Control, and Graham tells them about Oron.  The team accepts the challenge and launches in the lions.  They arrive on Oron and look for parking.  Roland is trying to convince his fellow citizens not to leave Galaxy Garrison, but the people don't trust Voltron.  It's because of all the missiles.  Right.  The citizens mock him and Kruger seethes at the arrival of the Voltron force.

An officer greets the Voltron force.  They're in the council, and Kruger reveals he's had Roland arrested.  Keith tries to warn them about Zarkon.  Then Kruger reveals they've made a trade agreement with Zarkon.  Then robot ships from Doom attack and start destroying the city in animation that looks unfinished.

Cossack in a skull ship strafes the Oron missile batteries.  Kruger orders missiles launches.  They destroy Doom fighters and hit Cossack's ship.  Cossack laughs them off and sees the Voltron force leaving--Oron isn't their territory anymore.  Then Cossack calls Kruger on the ultrawave.  He accuses Kruger of breaking the agreement by inviting Voltron.  Kruger protests.  Cossack suggests there are spies, and Kruger gets paranoid.  Cossack orders him to get rid of Voltron.

Kruger goes on television and accuses Voltron of starting the battle.  Roland is apparently wandering around, and some citizens threaten him with the police.  Meanwhile, the Voltron force is on house arrest, and they see citizens going to vandalize the lions.  Pidge picks the lock and they run down to confront the angry mob.  Keith tries to sway public opinion.  It doesn't go so well.

Cossack gets impatient, and he drops a bomb on the city and starts blowing up more missile batteries.  Panic ensues.  Keith and Allura decide to help.  Keith finds an abandoned child in the path of a bomb, and Lance intercepts it with red lion's tail laser, while Keith covers him from the shrapnel.  Cossack find the heroics revolting.  The kid's mom demands him back from Keith. 

A riot is forming, so Lance urges the team to leave.

Kruger announces that the Voltron force has been ejected and that ambassador Cossack is landing.  Then Cossack takes the government over at gunpoint.  He enslaves Kruger along with the rest of the Orons, and Roland starts a rebellion, convincing some citizens to start wreckin' robots.  While another Oron starts a diversion, Roland and his impromptu freedom fighters shoot their way into the communications tower and call the Voltron force for help.  The team teases Keith about some weird incident that involved him getting lost in blue lion.

Cossack is crowning himself emperor when the lions return and form Voltron.  Cossack tries using the Oron missiles against Voltron.  He dodges, then destroys them with the spinning laser blades and foot missiles.  The Orons are inspired to knock a couple of robots off a bridge.  Voltron fight Cossack in the skull ship, and then he launches another dumb robeast with that weird, lame growl. 

The robeast shoots energy at Voltron, and the big guy just stands there for the zapping.  As Voltron falls, the robeast bites him.  Lance grabs it with red lion, then Pidge shoots fire at him and the robeast crashes into buildings.  It shoots needles or something from somewhere, and they counter with needles of their own.  Then it knocks Voltron down with its tail--which they grab and use to swing the Robeast around.  Then they form the blazing sword and destroy this lame-ass thing.

Cossack fumes as he escapes with Haggar's space coffin close behind.

Voltron and Roland pose for the Oron citizens.  Kruger tries to sell his missile launchers.  Voltron returns to Arus.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Take a Robot to Lunch

Take a Robot to Lunch

Either one of the mechanical designers on this episode also worked for Studio Nue, or they just stole/borrowed designs from Super Dimensional Cavalry Southern Cross . . .

The planet of Caspia.  Optimus Prime tells us that Cossack and some redesigned Doom robots are surrounding a lone robot--THAT LOOKS AN AWFUL LOT LIKE DANA STERLING'S ARMOR FROM SOUTHERN CROSS!  The robot singlehandedly destroys a unit of Doom robots.  Haggar and Lotor are watching via crystal ball.  With an army of these, Lotor could conquer everything.

A shuttle enters Arusian airspace.  The shuttle design looks a lot like the air cav shuttles that drop the 15th ATACs on the Robotech Master's mothership.  Coran knows the "techie" who is being conveyed by the shuttle.  Coran and the team go to meet her as she lays flowers in the ruins of a building.  Coran tries to convince "Maryanne" to join them, but she wants no part in fighting.  Her last robot was stolen by Zarkon, but it would take more violence to take him back.  She explains that this "monument" was once her home--until Zarkon invaded it and destroyed everything. 

Oh, and Haggar's cat is watching everything.  Maryanne leaves.  And we're left suspecting that ol' Coran's got a thing for the lady scientist.  Then the space mice see the blue cat and warn Allura.  Coran suspects Haggar is after Maryanne, so he sends the Voltron Force after her.

Maryanne is just leaving Arus airspace when Haggar surrounds her with Doom fighters.  They chase her ship until Haggar can catch her in the flying coffin.  The coffin fires a blast that disables the shuttle--and then the lions launch missiles at the fighters in an effort to drive Haggar back.  They release Maryanne's shuttle from the forefield, and the animation is a crazy mix between first season battles and bad current season stuff.  The Doom ships and Haggar leave, but Maryanne's shuttle is nowhere to be found.  The team is perplexed, but they find her home planet, Caspia.

Maryanne has landed her shuttle, and is walking through the ruins of demolished robots, and hears the Doom robots firing on her stolen robot.  Cossack looks on as the robot destroys another group of Doombots.  Maryanne hears Hunk's voice, and decides to build another robot.  This one STILL looks like Southern Cross armor.  And it's quite, um, feminine, though it has Michael Bell's voice. 

Lance picks up Maryanne's shuttle, and they land outside her lab.  They sneak in the abandoned-looking tunnels, but it's all a ruse.  They find an opening to an underground stairway and a secret room.  The enter her laboratory and find a picture of Maryanne as a child and her parents.

Cossack is still watching the robot shoot other robots.  And then Maryanne's blue robot destroys the evil red robot, before reprogramming the Doom robots to never fight again.  Cossack is dismayed.  The robots leave.  Lotor is upset when Cossack tells him.  He sends him back to capture Maryanne.

Keith has found Maryanne on the ultrawave, but she's being chased by Doom robots.  A laser shot grazes her ankle and she falls.  Pidge leaps out of the rocks and covers her, sending her to find Keith.  Maryanne finds Keith and Hunk.  Keith tends to her wound and sends Hunk to help Pidge.  Hunk returns to tell them that Haggar is holding Pidge hostage.  Maryanne offers to give herself up, then she passes out.  From the leg wound.  Okay.

Haggar and some Doom robots are holding Pidge near a geyser.  In a cave, Hunk and Keith bring Maryanne back around.  She has an idea to rescue Pidge.

Haggar tries to be funny.  Pidge tries to be selfless.  Then Maryanne's blue robot leaps out of the geyser and rescues Pidge.  Haggar summons her robeast.  While the mechanical designs are kinda cool--being all Robotech-lookin', the robeast is terrible looking.  They form Voltron.

Voltron dropkicks the robeast.  Lance makes fun of its teeth.  Then it inflates, starts floating, and uses flashing lights to hypnotize the Voltron force.  Allura has goggles that filter out the hypnotic lights.  Blue lion kicks the robeast and jars everyone else awake.  Allura takes control while the rest of the team flies with their eyes closed.  She forms blazing sword,  The robeast has switchblade claws.  That's too bad, 'cuz even with their eyes closed and only Allura guiding them, they cut the robeast in half.  Haggar makes use of the space coffin flying to the command ship footage for THE THIRD TIME and flees.

Maryanne and Allura have some girl time together in the Castle of Lions while the blue robot chases the space mice around.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Who Was That Masked Man?

Who Was That Masked Man?

On Doom, Cossack and Haggar are commiserating about the unfairness of good vs. evil.  Because evil always loses.  Haggar convinces Cossack to help her "get them."  Her plan is already underway on planet Pollux.

Bandor is practicing semaphore signals with Sven.  Bandor tells her that someone has crashed.  Then Romelle gets all . . . girly.  Sven is living in a little cottage instead of in the castle.  He talks creepily while looking at Romelle through binoculars.  Then he gets on his white horse and rides to the . .  dam?  Helmeted laborers see Sven arrive and they start a helicopter to fly to the castle.  Then Bandor tells him that a ship had crashed in the valley.  It's a Doom slave ship.  There are crash survivors scattered about.

Romelle and Bandor arrive.  One of the survivors is wearing a mask.

Meanwhile, Haggar's space coffin lands, and they have the masked dude in a hospital bed.  He refuses to take his mask off because Haggar made him ugly.  Romelle tries to appeal to their common slavehood.  Then Bandor rushes into the room to tell Sven his house is on fire.  He rides hi horse back to check it out.  And finds Haggar and her cat.  Haggar makes jokes, but Sven actually makes a call back to the original series.  But Haggar pulls out a big . .  remote control thing, and tells him she already has Romelle captured.

In the castle, the slaves reveal themselves to be Doom agents and take the nurses and Romelle hostage. 

Sven looks at the captives paraded on the castle tower through binoculars while Haggar taunts him.

On Arus, Coran reveals they've lost communications with Pollux.  He has one last communications link left, a, um, thing, and then it dies, too.  The team decides to fly to Pollux to investigate. 

The team arrives on Pollux and the mice have the mouse mecha in the blue lion.  I mean, does this really surprise anyone anymore.  And how many goddamned mice are there now?

Haggar cackles and tells Sven she knows the lions are coming.  And tells him she's going to, um, break open the dam and wash them out to sea?  What?  How will this work?  Haggar casts a spell on Sven when he tries to stop her. 

The lions fly over the dam and see Sven crawling on all fours in front of it.  They get out of their lions, and Sven tells them that he's decided to join Doom, and then Haggar comes out of hiding and mocks them.  Then a Rooster Frigate lands on the dam. 

Sven signals Allura with his watch in morse code.  She tells the mice to go rescue Romelle.  Then the cat takes off after the mouse mecha.  But they lose the cat on the edge of a cliff and drop pick-axes on it.  Really.

A hatch opens in the side of Lotor's ship, and Lotor comes out, and Haggar offers Allura and Romelle to Lotor.  Hunk insults Lotor, and Lotor launches his jetski invader brigade.  The team and Sven fight back.  The team gets back in their lions.  Lotor returns to the bridhe of his command ship and Haggar and the cat get back to her coffin.  She tells the slaves to guard Bandor and Romelle.

The masked slave has them all rounded up in the banquet room.  Bandor demands to know why they're working for Lotor, and it's because he made empty promises.  Then the mouse plane drops the chandelier on the masked slave and Bandor grabs his gun and tells him to make his day.

The lions attack the ship, but there's a momentary animation error where the lions fall back, but they forgot to include the missiles the ship is firing.  Cossack tells Haggar the slaves have failed, but Haggar casts a spell that super-sizes the masked slave into a robeast.  A really dumb-looking robeast with a terrible growling noise.  It grabs Romelle and Bandor and flies off.

The lions form Voltron.  They face off against the robeast, but can't fight back because it's holding ROmelle and Bandor.  And she does the usual selfless heroine speech.  Haggar gloats.  The robeast launches meganeedles all over Voltron, and Sven suggests cutting its claws.  So they use the head of green lion and Voltron's wings.  Green lion detaches at the elbow instead of the wrist this time.  They drop off Romelle and Bandor, reattach the left arm, form blazing sword, and this robeast's done. 

Lotor poses in front of Romelle's castle and she and Sven embrace and wave.  Then Voltron takes off.  Optimus Prime gives us a Voltron commercial.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Little Buddies

Little Buddies

Again, we expand the Voltron universe and show them bonding with more people on different planets.  And get some backstory on Hunk.  Such as it is.

The lions are on their way home after adventures on Zahl and Mira, so Prime tells us.  Woah, continuity.  Hunk recognizes a nebula where he saved some kids.  And they make fun of Pidge's and Hunk's sizeses.  Then they send Hunk off to go visit his buddies on the planet.  He takes off, and then Lance picks up some Doom ships.  The team decides to remain in the area. 

On Doom, Cossack is a-knockin' at Zarkon's door.  Then Lotor comes up behind him and confronts him.  Then Lotor just pushes the door open and has Cossack peek at him sleeping in his chair.  Ah, old people are so funny.  But Lotor never sleeps because he's plotting.  Cossack goes for the talky-feely sensitive man for the 80s approach, but Haggar mocks him, and then offers him a task.

Hunk is approaching the planet, reminiscing about how he was sent there by the space academy.  The planet had just been invaded by Doom, and the planet was in ruins.  He stands around and looks at the wreckage, and then gets his suitcase stolen by a kid.  He shares his stolen spoils--including sandwiches--with other children.  Then Hunk finds them and the kid threatens Hunk with karate.  Oh, but the kid doesn't really know karate.  That's how you make friends--humiliate them!  And he shanghais the kids into a chain gang to rebuild the town.  He gets all misty-eyed thinking about it.

Galaxy Garrison radar personnel pick up a Doom transport in the Azure quadrant.  They call the Voltron Force.  Hunk answers and says he's on vacation.  They try to warn him about the Doom transport, but he doesn't listen. 

Haggar gloats because she and Cossack has snuck by using the transport as a ploy.  They're sneaking up on yellow lion.  Cossack and Haggar act all gross.

Hunk gets off of yellow lion and sings.  Which is even grosser than Cossack and Haggar.  He thinks back to when he helped them build their house.  They're nt home, so he sits down on the stoop to wait for them.  Then they sneak up on them and a reunion is had. 

Cossack and Haggar land nearby and two kids see them while fishing.  They head home.  Cossack climbs into yellow lion and tries to start it, but he doesn't have the key.  Haggar says they don't have to fly it.  They just have to dismantle it.  The kids sneak back and see Cossack arranging his guards outside the lion.  The kids go back to tell Hunk, but they kick their bucket of fish and the guards hear them and pursue.

Hunk and the kids prepare to face Cossack, though Hunk warns them to be careful.  They sneak up on yellow lion (awful lot of sneakin' in this episode).  The kids stage a diversion so Hunk can run for yellow lion.  He gets to his lion, but Cossack has the kids hostage.

The team is wondering why they haven't heard from Hunk, so they decide to go see what's happening.

Cossack uses the kids to bargain for the key from Hunk.  The girl is on the lion with him, and Hunk passes her the key. 

Pidge gets a scrambled code from yellow lion.  They decide to go investigate.

The girl inadverdantly launches the lion and knocks Cossack over.  Haggar, meanwhile, is in her spce coffin and summons a flamethrowing robeast spider--that vaporizes some robots.

The lions come upon the girl piloting yellow lion and put the flames out.  Haggar is annoyed.  Hunk and the girl switch places.  They form Voltron.

They start fighting.  And.  It's animated rather, um, confusingly.  There's a lot of flamethrowing involved.  And then ice beams.  And then they form the blazing sword and forntuately the horrible AKOM-esque animation is over.  Haggar flies her space coffin to the command ship.  The kids celebrate.  Voltron waves.  Hunk thanks his little buddies.  Then Voltron takes off. 

Back on planet Doom, Zarkon is upset that Haggar and Cossack have failed.  Guess Cossack was no improvement over Lotor.  Lotor is lounging in the throne room, behind a pillar.  Optimus Prime tells us that evil was foiled and kids can play in the sun, thanks to Voltron.



Monday, October 17, 2011

Voltron Meets Jungle Woman

Voltron Meets Jungle Woman

No, really, that's the title.  I ain't makin' this up.

OK, so really.  For the most part, I've focused on what I don't like about these second-season Voltron episodes.  Which is the writing, the music, the animation, and some of the voice-acting.  But this--and the last--episodes have examples of things that I do like about this permutation of Voltron.  They expand the universe somewhat, and explore adventures that involve more that just our five main heroes.  Since these episodes don't have the overriding arc driving the plot that the Golion-derived shows did, I suppose ranger farther afield for their stories is a necessity.

On Doom, Haggar cackles as she's about to cross a slave with a fish.  Okay, so there's still a lot of crap in these episodes.  It's a coelecanth.  Found off the coast of Madagascar?  Coelecanth.  A robot actually shows up to give Lotor his "Mean Potion."  At this point I'm beginning to think Scrooge McDuck is going to show up.

So, they created the creature of the black lagoon, and Lotor is angry at Haggar that he's still just man-sized.  He wanters her to throw it away, but she decides to take it to the jungle planet, Mira, where the most beautiful-giant-flowers grow.  AND ARE TURNED INTO POISON.

Slaves are hard at work on Mira, harvesting the poisonous flowers.  Cossack and Haggar arrive in a slaave ship to drop the fishman off.  The pollen of the flowers awakens the fishman and he escapes.  He gets stuck in the sticky grass until someone frees him with molotov cocktails.  Well, okay, they're torches.  Thrown by a wild jungle woman.  Robots take off on their jetskis.  The jungle woman throws water on the fishman, and then helps him onto her horse and they disappear into the jungle.

A robot shows up to tells Cossack that a Galaxy Alliance ship is about to crash.  Yep.  We go live to the crashing ship, and they're crashing.

Space Marshall Graham at Galaxy Garrison tells them that a cargo ship full of young pilots is crashing on planet Mira.  Coran sends the Voltron Force after some hilarity.  Hi-LAR-ity.  Blruagh.  They launch.

Oh, look, Cheddar and the mice have stowed away on blue lion.  Allura tells them they're going through the cat galaxy.

The GG troops are unloading their wounded from the ship when Jungle Girl and Fishman arrive.  Things almost get violent when a wounded pilot intervenes and Jungle Girl puts him on her horse.  Then Cossack arrives to take them all prisoner.  Oh, wait, no.  Jungle Girl, the wounded pilot, and Fishman get away.  Jungle Girls destroys the pursuing robots all Ewok-style. 

Jungle Girl tends to the wounded pilot's injuries in her tree house, and then plays the pan-pipes for him.  Apparently the Fishman is her father. 

AUUGH!!!!

Maybe they shouldn't stray from the main Voltron-driven core.

Lotor calls Haggar on her crystal ball to warn her that the lions are on their way.  The lions land and find the abandoned alliance ship, which has been stripped by the Doom robots. 

Jungle Girl explains to the pilot that the Fishman is someone important and that he'll help them save the other GG men.

The pilot watches his crewmates work harvesting the pollen.  The Fishman starts setting the sticky grass on fire.  Cossack orders robots with water cannons to put out the fire, but Jungle Girl and the pilot burn a path on the other side.  They disable the one robot guarding them, and they free the slaves, but get captured by the robots.

Keith sees smoke on the horizon and they fly to investigate.  Haggar is going to use her captives as bait.  They lions fly by and see the Jungle Firl and the pilot surrounded by robots.  Hunk and ALlura fly in to the rescue.  Haggar cackles.  Keith flies in as well.  Haggar casts a spell on the tree and it grabs yellow and blue lions.  And green, for some reason. 

Haggar turns her powers on . . . um, a crocodile robeast that she supersizes.  The fishman, meanwhile, runs through the flames and tackles robots.  The mice leave blue lion and run down the tree.  Keith shoots the robeast with missiles.  Lance follows in red lion.  Haggar dodges debris and accidentally supersizes the fishman.  While the fishman robeast faces the crocodile robeast, Lance cuts the other lions free.  The fishman frees Jungle Girl and the pilot, and she reveals (sort of) that he's her father.

The lions form Voltron.  They grab the crocodile robeast's jaws and throw it.  Then they form the blaing sword.  Yawn. 

Jungle Girl is using her pan flutes to play music to heal the fishman.  The pilot requests his captain leave him here to guard the planet.  Suddenly, the fishman transforms back into his normal state.  Then Keith arrives, and the Galaxy Garrison ship takes off alongside the lions. 

Sunday, October 16, 2011

The Traitor

The Traitor

On planet Doom, Zarkon is mocking Haggar and the use of an Octovore.  Wow, a clip show?  It's not like they have violence to cut and make up for.  Haggar says they've been losing due to a lazon shortage/  Could this be continuity?  Callbacks to an old episode?  Haggar has found a new source of Lazon.  She has found a planet Zarkon's probes have overlooked.  Then Cossack comes out of the shadows, having been eavesdropping.  Zarkon sends Cossack and Haggar to harvest the lazon.  They round up the slaves to bring to the planet, and one, Joran, was apparently once a Doom warrior.  Cossack is flying around on a flying jetski when Lotor shows up and takes over.  The slave gallyes take off under Lotor's command.

In the slave quarters, two slaves mock Joran for having once been a Doom soldier. 

The lions are out on patrol when Lance, and then the rest of the team, spot the slave galleys.  They make funny jokes.  Ha ha.  Then Allura gives Coran a senior moment.  Making fun of the elderly is fun!

They slave ships have landed on the planet Zahl.  Keith gives us a bit of history--there was a legend of people living under the surface.  As he speaks, one of the legendary underground dwellers emerges from the sand and watches the slaves working.

Joran's cellmates decide to kill him for being a traitor.  Unfortunately for them, he can actually fight.  Then a robot guard arrives and Joran falls off a cliff.  They give him up for dead, but the Fremen observer picks him up before the robot slavers find him.  The Fremen takes her to an underground complex, where he regains consciousness.

The Fremen takes her mask off and reveals herself as Omnia.

The lions approach planet Zahl and receive approach coordinates from some unknown sender, so they follow it.

Omnia explains that the city was built by a mysterious race that vanished.  Omnia's people are here to avoid Zarkon, but now they have to fight him again.  Omnia's original planet was destroyed by a younger, brown-haired Lotor.  Joran breaks down.  One of her underlings arrives and tells her that the Voltron force is arriving.  Joran starts to leave, but Omnia stops him. 

The lions approach the planet and a dome opens.  The team lands and Omnia welcomes them.  Omnia tells them about Lotor's base and Joran, the escaped slave, who mutters weird ominous things under his breath.  He tells Keith that they're mining Lazon. 

The team decides to go in guerilla-style.  They try to convince Joran to lead them as an insider, but he reveals his past as a traitor, and refuses.  He tells how he ended up being enslaved after destroying a robot whipping a slave. 

Omnia draws a pistol and aims at Joran.  Everyone freaks out.  She fires--and hits a giant scorpion that had been on the wall next to him.  She then declares her love(?) for Joran, and she and her rebels decide to let him go on his way.  And then Joran has a change of heart and decides to help the Voltron force.

At the base, they climb up the cliff using grappling hooks.  They sneal in and disable robot guards and set us up the bombs.  Joran goes to free the slaves, but the two slaves who tried to kill him refuse to listen--until the demolition charges start demolishing the place.  The slaves escape, until Joran's fan club confronts him.  The ceiling caves in and he catches it, allowing them to escape.  The black lion breaks through the wall to rescue him.

Haggar, Cossack, and lotor watch the base go up in flames, but Haggar says she still has enough Lazon for revenge.  She unleashes a scorpion-robeast.  The team gets in their lions and form Voltron. 

The robeast is more like a killer bee robeast.  It follows them off-planet, and they form the blazing sqord pretty quickly and--whew--the episode is almost over.  Haggar and Cossack watch the robeast explode, and then escape.

Optimus Prime tells us that the pople of Zahl and their special friend Joran watch the sunrise next to Voltron.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

The Shell Game

The Shell Game

We slowly zoom in on planet Arus as Optimus Prime tells us that Arus has come a long way since the days they hid in caves from Zarkon.  And then a robeast crashes into the middle of a city and starts "smashing everything."

That horrible robot voice summons Coran and Allura to Castle control to see the crazy crab monter wrecking the place.  Keith has trouble awakening Hunk.  Coran seems to think that today will be the ultimate test?  How can he tell?  They launch the lions to new "action scene" music.  Yecch.  Bring back the old stuff!

The lions engage some Doom fighters and take them down without any trouble.  Then Keith attacks the crab with black lion and gets flung off.  Lance calls him, but Keith is apparently unconscious.  The crab starts burning everything, then Keith awakens and rejoins the others.

There are people trapped under the crab.  They can't form Voltron because that would somehow hurt the trapped people.  They try to lure the crab away, but that just gets green and yellow lions out of commission.  Keith and Allura try to save them, but blue lion is knocked clear into another episode and crashes.  Allura regains consciousness to find that Keith and Lance are stuck in foam and Pidge and Hunk are being held onto by the robeast.

In the ship above, Haggar and Lotor gloat.  Then another, identical robeast bursts out of the shell of the first, leaving the first to menace to town and keep the Voltron force captive.  The second one goes to destroy the castle, and Lotor gloats some more.  Oh, look.  It's tunneling to the castle.  Coran tries to get Allura to get blue lion moving, and then reveals he's a Wiccan and tells her to use the Violet Pentagram program.  Then alarms go off in the castle as the robeast attacks.  Cue nanny and the mice as the robeast makes the castle spring a leak.  The mice fly around in the mouse mecha but get shot down by the blue cat--whom they kamikaze into, setting its tail on fire.  Haggar tells the robeast to "maaake them paaay!"

Coran finds Nanny running through the castle corridors.  He tries to stop the robeast with fire doors.  It just melts through them.

Allura still can't get blue lion running--until she hits the power switch.  Then she launches and the robeast tries to smash into Castle Control.  Coran explains to Nanny that Allura's gone to free the other lions.  She cuts Pidge loose, and then she wakes up Hunk and tells him to blast himself free.  He gets free, and then Haggar reminds them that there are civilians under threat. 

In the castle, Crab 2 is wrecking chandeliers and punching its way into Castle Control.  Then Coran calls for help.  Uh, what was he just saying?  Allura leaves Hunk and Pidge to guard the people.  The blue cat has the mice cornered, but the blue lion appears, distracting the cat long enough for the mice to bite its tail.

The robeast is about to break into the control room, but Coran is ready with a ridiculous cannon on the control desk.

Allura rushes to her father's tomb and asks for help.  Alfor ex Machina appears and gives her a key to place in the crest.  The roof starts rumbling, and she gives Cheddar the key while she fights the robeast.  The mice take the key to castle control and turn it.  Things start doing things.  The insignia crest flies off of the front of the castle, which forces the first crab to back away.  Pidge saves the trapped civilians.  The foam trapping Lance and Keith is melted, and the first crab explodes. 

Blue lion and the robeast surface from the moat, and they form Voltron.  They land to face the robeast.  It breathes fire at them.  They hit it with some weird eye-beam varient.  Then it stabs Voltron with a stabbing, knocking him down.  They struggle a little more, then Keith orders the spinning laser blade, and then Lance and Pidge launch their lion heads.  Then they ignite lion torches, but it keeps coming.  It's got its own eye beams, but Voltron dodges and forms the blazing sword.  Any guesses as to what happens next?

Voltron surveys the wreckage.  Haggar's space coffin lifts off as she is still in denial.  Lotor growls and leaves the bridge of his flagship as it leaves Arus.

Optimus Prime tells us that peace has returned and rebuilding starts.  Allura tells them that the common folk are the real heroes.  The mice work on the mouse mecha. 

Friday, October 14, 2011

Mousemania

Mousemania

We get a unique orbital view of Doom.  We know it's Doom because Optimus Prime tells us it is.  Lotor is overseeing poor weakling slaves as they build a secret power base Lotor will use to overthrow his father.  Then a robeast appears, scares off all the slaves, and trashes the base.  Poor Lotor.  Haggar appears behind Lotor and tells him that Zarkon has ordered the base construction.  The robeast go crazy and eats the wreckage.  Haggar says they'll have to start a new plan together.  Angry, Lotor stalks off.  Then the blue cat starts yowling.

In Haggar's lab, she transforms the robeast into a sabre-toothed tiger.  And then into a white kitten.  It kinda looks like my parent's cat.  The runty cat that wants to kill me.  Then she sends the cat to Arus.  Will all its pretty hills and trees.  Really.  That's a line.

In the castle of Lions, Pidge is eating an apple, when he sees Haggar's blue cat.  He runs out to investigate, but it's a ploy by the mice to steal his apple.  He chases after them and they electrocute him.  Smoldering ('cuz that's what happens when you get electrocuted) Pidge chases the mice into Allura's room, where she's dressing.  Lance, Keith and Hunk find him and all have to do an obligatory pratfall.  Then a white kitten shows up and Pidge decides use it to hunt the mice.

What.  The.  Hell.

Meanwhile, Allura just encourages the mice.  Haggar is watching the castle from her space coffin.  And she'll wait for the witching hour, when her powers are at their peak.  Yesh.

Pidge is dressed in a chef uniform and presents his asteroid souffle.  Really.  But, of course, it's all a trap for the mice.  The mice try to use a fishing pole from a chandelier to steal the food.  But the white cat is in the pot and Tom and Jerry hilarity ensues.  Pidge chases a mouse right up Allura's skirt, and she tells them to let the mice go.  Well, they have three mice tied up and the parents are apologizing.  Urg.  Hunk frees them.

In her coffin, Haggar watches it all on her crystal ball.  She fires a lightning bolt at the castle that just tells the castle defense system where she is.  Coran sees her coffin leave.  Haggar flies her coffin to Lotor's flagship, and she tells him what her kitten operative is up to.  Lotor decides to take over. 

Coran orders lights out in the castle, and the kitten turns into a sabre-tooth tiger and slashes its way out of Pidge's room and lets the blue cat in.  The two cats run to the control room and wreck the defense system computers.  One of the mice sees it happen, so they all board the mouse mecha.  They attack the two cats.  The sabre tooth tiger knocks the mecha out of the air and the cats trap one of the mice.  Coran enters the control room just in time to see the cats escaping, who charge past the team with Cheddar.  They launch the lions.

On his command ship, Lotor and Haggar gloat.  Cheddar is in a cage on the bridge.  The lions and the ship trade fire.  Then the robeast appears and bats the lions around, starting with yellow.  And moving to green.  Keith is ordering the lions to attack in succession.  However, in one cool moment, the black lion harpoon is used like a rocket rope to electrocute the robeast.  AND THEY ACTUALLY DESTROY IT.

Lotor is angry.  And beginning to panic.  Haggar just cackles.  They're going to use the mouse.  An energy globe with Cheddar appears.  Then the ship fires on them.  The mouse mecha takes off, but Pidge decides that he's going to be the one to do it.  Then they form Voltron.

They launch the green lion head.  It takes took tries, but they rescue the mouse.  Um, how does Pidge steer when he's standing in the mouth of the lion?  They rejoin Voltron and Lotor launches missiles at Voltron.  The detroy the missiles with the machinegun pod, then form the blazing sword and stab the flagship.  Which Lotor has called a battle station all along.  Then he escapes in either his old flaship or the batplane.

Oh, great.  Nanny.  And then the mice thank them.  Oh, where's Cheddar?  They're giving Pidge a present.  Which is a cake.  Cheddar samples the frosting.  Well, that part was at least sort of cute.  And then Coran gives us a weird commercial for Arus tourism and for Voltron.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Envoy from Galaxy Garrison

Envoy from Galaxy Garrison

This is the episode I remember most distinctly for airing on the day the Challenger exploded.  So when I got the DVDs as an adult, suddenly I was catapulted back to that incident--completely unexpectedly.  It's not like I'd think of the Challenger disaster and immediately *also* think, oh, yeah that was the day I saw that second-season Voltron episode with the grouchy Galaxy Garrison Guy.  But watching it now, it's all I remember.  Every commercial break, promises that the news airing after this show will feature the Challenger, prominently.

We open on planet Doom.  Rather than the subtitles of the first season, Optimus Prime describes it.  Zarkon is taunting someone.  Oh, it's Cossack this time, instead of Lotor.  Cossack begs Zarkon to allow him to prove himself.  Lotor appears and taunts Cossck.  He also goes and sits down on his father's just-vacated throne.  Really?  Doesn't Zarkon have spies?!  That's how Frank Herbert told me these regimes work.  Intrigues within intrigues.

Haggar is in her lab, laughing.  Zarkon tells her the laugh is repulsive.  She thanks him.  Then she tells him about a quarry of liquified moonstones.  She does something in her lab and, um, the moonstone is actually . . . doing something.  Then it becomes a turtle-looking robeast.  Haggar asks him to make her queen of Doom if they succeed.  Zarkon is ready to dump Lotor.  Who is naturally lurking in the corner, until Haggar catches him.

On Arus, things are peaceful and sunny, so Prime tells us.  They're having a party for the envoy from Galaxy Garrison.  He's naturally going to change things up and outlaw Voltron and blah-blah-blah-boooring.  The mice steal Pidge's apple.  Lance drools over the princess.

Haggar convinces Zarkon the party is a good time to use the robeast.

The mice (a bunch of blue guys now--YES I'M KEEPING TRACK).  Pidge chases them to the mouse hole, and then the general mocks him for not behaving like a real pilot.  Blargh.

Haggar arrives and makes some weird Disney incantation and sneaks toward the castle through the woods.

Coran and Allura dance, and Lance and Hunk are sad.  But she just wants to dance with Coran.  AUUGH!!!  Of course the general thinks they should be out training.  Oh, and they're not real pilots.  Because that's how all staff officers are.  Old.  Contemptuous of new things.  Stodgy.  They all sound like Robert Loggia.  And claim Voltron's obselete.  And Pidge makes an "order" joke.  Then he wants to look at the Control Room.  So Pidge leads him.

The blue cat sneaks into the castle.

Then the general wants to be left alone in control room--which we see now as a weird cylinder sort of thing from the outside.  Then the cat sneaks by.  Pidge tells they other guys, and they contront the general while the mice taunt the cat.  Then some trees get uprooted by the new robeast's arrival.  It's Haggar's darling moon-pod.  Really.  That's what she says. 

Hm.  I think this moon-pod robeast (which Haggar copied out of a book) is a member of the Gamera family.  Then alarms go off and the general acts like a douche.  Coran urges Allura to finish dancing so they don't alarm the guests, and then she goes to join the rest of the lions.  Oh, and grumpy pants says no Voltron.  Then Allura runs by and Coran tells him they're used to doing things their own way.  Grumpy-pants says they need discipline.

The robeast trashes a farm and scare some horses.  The cat is in Pidge's cockpit.  Coran warns the civilians.  Grumpy pants orders them to fly directly at a signal Keith wanted to circle around towards.  They come up on the robeast and start firing.  Black lion has a back-mounted missile launcher between its wings.  The other lions use their standard weapons.  None of them have an effect.  Keith wants to form Voltron, but Grumpy-pants refuses to allow them.  Then the cat jumps on Pidge's controls and turns of the power or something.  Green lion crashes.  Oh, hey , the mice were in the cockpit, too.  They bite the cat's tail and he drops a key.

Haggar gets real weird and uses and incantation to turn the flying saucer moonpod into, yep, Gamera.  Grumpy-pants gives them a dumb order, and they argue about it.  Hunk charges the robeast head on and gets knocked down.  Naturally, it's the Voltron force's fault and Grumpy pants wants to replace them.  Then Space Marshall Graham, who was apparently watching this while he ate launch, calls and puts Keith in command.  Keith promptly gets snared.  Pidge looks all over his cockpit for the key--which the mouse gives him.

The robeast tries to eat the black lion, but he's rescued by Pidge and Allura--but wasn't Hunk the one knocked out by the robeast?  Oh well.  They form Voltron.

They hit Gamera with the lion head attack--again only with the hand lions, and then it charges them.  Yeah, a giant turtle probably isn't fast enough to catch Voltron.  They form the blazing sword and moon-pod Gamera blows up.

Zarkon calls Haggar and mocks Haggar's crystal ball.  Like a poor craftsman, she blames her cat.

Back at the castle, General Grumpy-pants learns his lesson about age-discrimination.  Oh, and the Voltron Force poses, and people gush comments.  And I realize that this is basically the Galactica 1980 version of Voltron.  Except, I kinda like Galactica 1980 for all its goofiness and awkwardness.  This, compared to the earlier Voltron, is just any other 80s cartoon now.  At least Galactica 1980 was unique.  Garbage, but unique garbage.  This is just generic animated stuff.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Dinner and a Show

Dinner and a Show

We pan across farm fields and windmills.  The farmers are working hard.  Then a flying andcrawler lands and Doom robots charge out, led by Cossack the Terrible.

Sven, Bandor, and Romelle are looking at a dam with some Pollux official.  Sven shakes hands and makes it official that he's going to remain a part of Polluxian government.  Then Bandor teases Sven about his feelings for Romelle.  Sven's character model is based on his original one, in his Japanese school uniform rather than the socialist blue-chambray workshirt and trousers he wore when he was dead and actually his brother.  Everyone laps at this meeting.

Meanwhile, the farmers are being herded into a group by the Doom troops and flying jetskis.  An old guy sends his son to warn Sven and distracts them with a tractor.  The robots capture him.

The boy makes it to the castle and warns Romelle.  Sven jumps on a white horse and charges after them.  Bandor follows and Romelle goes to warn Arus.

In Castle Control, the team receives Romelle's distress call, and they deploy in the lions. 

Cossack's slave raiders and moving their new-won chattel into the sandcrawler as Sven and Bandor begin fighting the robots.  They get surrounded.  This was actually a well-blocked set of scenes: I like the wide shot that pans from the slavers boarding their ship to the two dudes on horses, and also Sven and Bandor looking bewildered as the robots fly past them.  Why didn't they have animation like this in Fleet of Doom?!

Cossack sees that the Voltron Force is approaching and withdraws.  Haggar and Lotor discuss the fact that this scheme is a secret from Zarkon.  Then Zarkon calls.  He warns her not to help Lotor.  She agrees.  OOH--EVIL.

The lions see Cossack's ship and pursue.  Cossack leads them into the asteroids.  Suddenly the blue lion acts all weird and ALlura freaks out and crashes.  The other lions fly into a canyon on a big asteroid after her.

On the canyon floor, Allura regains consciousness, calls for help, and gets out of the lion when she gets no response.  She starts exploring the canyon and then *yawn^ gets captured by Doom robots, Cossack, and Lotor.  Lotor tries to convince her to fall in love with him.  And then introduces her to Cossack.  Yeah, that'll get ya the girls. 

Lotor/Sincline was dangerously obsessed with Allura/Fala to the point of psychosis.  Now Lotor is just a dumb nerded kid who hasn't figured out that you can't *make* girls like you.  Ugh.

Lotor tries to wine and dine Lotor.  And introduces her to some weird looking green dwarf dog thing.  And then shows her some S & M torture porn o get her in the mood.  Well, actually, it's Cossack whipping slaves.  Now he tries to get her to marry him in exchange for freeing the slaves.  She won't give in because the Voltron force will save them.  Then Lotor shows her the approaching lions.

The lions are flying through the canyon until they "hit an energy field" and crash.  But according to the animation, they just stop flying.  Black lion keeps going, until they all get ensared by tentacles.  Now Lotor tries another tact.  But Allura says, if you really liked me, you wouldn't be such a mean, dirty jerk.  So he completely ignores her and transmits his ultimatum to the lions.  They refuse, and Lotor turns up the power. 

Allura starts hallucinating King Alfor's voice.  Then he appears and tells her to fight for her friends.  So she just gets out her her chair and starts flipping robot guards--some of whom ARE STOPPED BY THE APPARITION OF ALFOR.  Who also opens doors for her.  She gets back to blue lion, launches and rescues her friends from the tentacles. 

Lotor moves into his command ship and escapes from the asteroid.  He and the slave ship sart to escape.  Black and red lions sever the tow cables connecting them to the slave ship.  Haggar unleashes the robeaast--an . . . octovore . . . ?  They form Voltron.

Voltron immediately bombards the octovore with missiles, and then gets ensared in its tentacles.  It crushes and electrocutes Voltron.  The slave watch Voltron as he's losing.  Then they increase to full power (thanks to a lot of stock footage of dials and guages--and they break free.  They hit the beast with the lion head attack (only using the red and green lions), and then destroy it with the blazing sword.

The slaves are returned to their fields to be happy vassals of benevolent monarchs (help, help, I'm being oppressed--come see the violence inherent in the system!)

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Fleet of Doom

Fleet of Doom

Optimus Prime tells us that both of the areas under the Voltron protection have enjoyed peace and prosperity.  Until Throk and Zarkon join forces.  We get a shot of the "Fleet of Doom," which combines the Doom and Drule mechanical designs into something that looks like Zentraedi ships.

Now Peter Cullen is back to his Hawkins' voice, and he introduces us to the secret energy planet that Zarkon has been searching for.  We get a weird, long sequence of them turning on some sort of reactor, and then the bad guys find them.  There's some brief scenes of running and exploding.  Hmm.  Dairugger was so much better at this kind of stuff, already.

We see an entire fleet of Rooster Frigates (this time in tasteful lavender) led by a new design for the command ship.  The Alliance forces fire back, but Cossack, the leader of the fleet, brushes it of and leaves, intent on revealing the location to Zarkon.  The Alliance personnel are amazed that they leave, but the commander tells them that they'll come back.  He orders Galaxy Garrison be contacted.

GG contacts Arus, and an outline of Space Marshal Graham tells the Voltron force of the situation.  On the Explorer, Hawkins briefs his Voltron force.  Galaxy Garrison is now talking to both Hawkins and Coran.  Hawkins says they'll use a special ship to get their fast.

The Castle of Lions transforms into the Flying Fortress and they set off for Akera.

On Planet Doom, Zarkon presents Cossack with the Distinguished Skull.  Cossack wants to lead the invasion, but Zarkon calls Throk.  The two go back and forth, and the Doom side of the invasion force is due to be commanded by Lotor.  The Drule base deploys its raiders, and Throk's HQ looks like the Mutant's base from Thundercats.  Both Throk and Zarkon plan on conquering each other.  AND the Drules have sent their own scientist to support Zarkon, to which Haggar takes offense, and she turns him into the fly.  Not the cool Jeff Goldblum fly.  The old one from the movie with Vincent Price.  Haggar tells Zarkon he'll regret something and she gives a "they'll be sorry" speech.

On the Flying Fortress, the team reminisces about their training with the other Voltron force.  Hurk.  And Allura Daydreams about picking flowers with the girl members.  Ugh.

Haggar is in, um, some . . . Place?  That looks like they were watching Krull and the Dark Crystal when they designed it.  She says some lame incantation, and flies a space coffin to the Flying Fortress and is going to invade the dreams of the sleeping Voltron force. 

A glowing pink Haggar flies past the sleeping space mice and looks in her crystal ball to see what they're all dreaming about.  Keith (who sleeps with a baby picture of himself?!) is having a nightmare about when he was in a forest at night and flipped out.  Apparently he was in the same forest as Wollo and his brother.

one of the mice comes out of the mousehole (good things to have in a SPACE SHIP, mouseholes) and sees the witch.  OK.  Golion had 4 mice pretty consistently.  WEP apparently didn't pay enough attention, because now there is a constantly varying number of mice.

ANYway.  The three awake members, Hunk, Lance and Pidge, are warned by the mice and go to rescue the princess.  Haggar steals her spirit and freezes the rest of the Voltron Force.

Y'know, even when I was 8, I liked Voltron and Robotech because they didn't do the usual "heroes get frozen/kidnapped/mummified/turned to stone/brainwashed/assimilated by swarm of radioactive bees (that really happened in Spiderman'n'friends).

Alfor appears and take Keith to save the princess.  That's basically all you need to know about that.

Keith appears in the dream world that Haggar has, um, created or something to match Keith's nightmares.

Zarkon's forces close in to attack the Flying Fortress.  Coran readies the artillery as the remaining three Voltron members launch.

In her dreamworld, Haggar makes Allura reappear.  Allura tries to appeal to Haggar's innate goodness.  She was cute.  And then Zarkon made her ugly and evil.  Blah blah blaaaah.

Lance leads the other two against Cossack and his Doom fleet, which launch redesigned Doom fighters.  These are actually pretty cool looking, for a later-season redesign.  The lions use their shoulder launchers to destroy the capital ships and the fighters.  Cossack seethes.  Lance orders the others to attack the ships with their knives.  Then Cossack uses the COSMOTRONIC FORCEFIELD (of science) and immobilizes the lions.

Okay, so this is a pretty normal gambit from Golion.  No complaints here.  Except that the shots were blocked out by someone so nearsighted he was only a few inches from the storyboards.

Keith is assaulted by monsters rejected by the Real Ghostbusters.  And then HE TURNS INTO A LITTLE BOY AND CRIES.  Then adult Keith runs.  Seriously.  These are failed designs from the Real Ghostbusters.  And then Keith's gun turns into a snake.

Haggar is watching, and thank the gods, we get the old Doom-theme background music.  This "new" music just ain't doin' it.  And then Keith sinks into red quicksand--And says "This stuff is really gloopy."  And gets chased around.  And then Alfor tells him how to defeat them and this whole thing is a pointless exercise.  Complete with Tom Cruise-style "fist bump and 'YEAH!'" in triumph.  Then Keith sees the place where Allura is imprisoned.

The Vehicle Voltron teams are on some new ship and we basically just check in to remind ourselves that we haven't forgotten them.

Meanwhile, Lance, Pidge, and Hunk pass out and Cossack starts to real them in with ultraclws.  He says "Yahoo."  And then Lance regains consciousness and fights his way free.  The other two escape and begin wreaking havoc among Cossack's fleet.  Cossack withdraws in his command ship.  Lance is ready to pursue, but Coran tells him that the Fleet of Doom has reached Akera.  Hawkins calls coran and tells them that they're caught in an astral-radial belt.  Hawkins sends the teams to get ready.  At least they get the uniform colors right half the time.

Keith runs up to Haggar's swamp fortress and confronts her with two pistols.  Haggar levitates Allura to him in a bubble, and then multiplies her image.  Of course, Keith can sense her.  Yeah, yeah, the good guys win.  Then the princess appeals to Haggar's good side, and the Good Witch Glenda emerges and the two aspects of Haggar allow Keith and Allura to escape.

Lotor and Throk (well, mostly Lotor) gloats over the destruction of Akera.  The Flying Fortress arrives, and Coran can't reach Hawkins.  And Lance acts stupid.  Then the lions launch--all three of them.  Lotor launches the rhino beast.  Who was apparently designed by Floro Dery when he wasn't designing Galvatron, the Sweeps, and the Predacons.  The Rhino beast grabs Hunk's lion.

Back in the castle, Keith and Allura arrive in the real world in Allura's room.  Good thing this scene isn't suggestive at all.  The two of them reach Castle Control in their flight suits, and Hawkins says he's made it to Akera, too.  Keith and Allura join the other three lions fighting the Rhino beast and they form Voltron. 

Voltron kicks the Rhino into a Doom ship.  Throk launches the Scorpio and Beetle beasts.  They launch missiles, but Voltron intercepts them.  The robeasts surround him.  They throw the spinning laser blades, but the Beetle catches it and the scorpion destroys it.  The three robeasts knock Voltron to the ground, and Lotor launches the Armor beast--which is an Armadillo.  Then the Vehicle teams arrive and they form their Voltron.

Hunk and Cliff trade some words and, if you think about Lennie Weinrib doing both voices, that's a little surreal.  And Jeff and Keith talking to each other.  Lion Voltron knocks the robeasts away and Vehicle Voltron temporarily disables them.

Lotor and Throk are freaking out.  lotor muses that his robeasts have a surprise.  He sends the final wave of robots to attack the base, then launches the bridge of his flagship and it forms the head of this new combiner gestalt robeast.  Which, again, looks like a Season 3 Transformer.  The robeast forms a mace/flail weapon, but the two Voltrons work together to defeat this weapon, and Lotor's use of the lazon beams.  Then he activates the super weapon system.  The two Voltrons form their solar combat spears (which are animated incorrectly).  The robeast crashes to the ground, adn the two Voltrons land.  Lotor gloats that the power base is being overrun.  Keith calls Coran, and he and Hawkins provide the power domes with covering fire.  Both ships land and debark infantry.  The robots don't stand a chance.

Lotor "forms the blazing scimitar," which is more like a sharp tuning fork.  He and the two Voltrons trade sword and weapons attacks for a while, and he slashes both Voltrons across the midriff and takes off, ready to attack.  But Jeff tells Keith to go for the skull on his chest, and the robeast doesn't have much longer to last.  Fortunately, Lotor's has an escape ship.

Haggar appears to see the Fleet of Doom destroyed.  Her younger self is absorbed, and she turns into a black-haired hot Haggar.

Cossack and Lotor are bowed before Zarkon when this new woman enters the throne room.  Zarkon gets all interested, and then she turns into old Haggar.

Meanwhile, the two Voltron teams are shaking hands, and the two Voltrons are standing side by side.

Aaand, we're done.

Monday, October 10, 2011

The End of Hazar's World/Galactic Dawn

The End of Hazar's World

Jeff looks back on how they helped the citizen of the Drule Empire against their oppressive government.  Now Jeff wonders what Zeppo was thinking, and reflects on how they've escaped.  Ginger sees Hazar emerge from the crowd of Drule citizens, and he asks them for help in evacuating the planet.    Hazar explains the situation to the Voltron Force in a building nearby.  Mozak enters the room and tells them how the weapons-testing destroyed the planet's internal balance.  They have only hours until the planet explodes.  Outside, Drule citizen panic at another earthquake.  Jeff has Ginger ferry Mozak to the Explorer to speak to Hawkins and Newley.  Then another earthquake strikes, and molten lava erupts somewhere.  Hazar looks grim.

Newley and Hawkins are looking over the underground city and trying to decide how to get them offworld.  Newley has contacted the reinforcement fleet, and hopefully they will arrive in time.  Ginger brings Mozak into the room and introduces him.  He drops to his knees and begs for their help, while Newley explains that they'll evacuate as many as they can, but there are more transports on the way--who will hopefully arrive in time.

Hawkins sends Ginger to prepare the women and children for evacuation.  The Alliance ships ground to board evacuees.  Jeff and Hazar discuss what led up to this, then Rocky tells Jeff to load the women and children first.  Hazar is optimistic.  Hazar, Dorma, and the Voltron Force in their mecha lead the citizens to the ships' landing area.

At the Alliance ships, Sparks is wondering why they haven't heard from the reinforcement fleet since first contacting them.  Then the people arrive.  Newley tells Mozak that they have a planet to migrate them to.  Mozak is overjoyed. 

The loading ensues, women and children first.  And there's some typical loading chaos, with some men freaking out.  Hazar assures children that everything will be OK.  Jeff shares his optimism with Dorma.  Two Drule officers approach Hazar . . .  And we cut to a fissure opening on the surface.  There's some panic.  Inside the ships, the Drules are packed in everwhere--hallways, engine rooms, with the Voltron Force on the lounge.

On the bridge, they haven't received word back from the reinforcement fleet.  Page appears onscreen and warns them that they only have two hours. 

Then we see the reinforcement fleet under Commodore Steele, composed of all ship types.  Some anty-gravity field has slowed them down. 

Some members of the Voltron Force are still holding back the Drule men.  Hutch tells Cliff they can't take any more, and they batten the hatches.  Jeff and Hawkins are sitting with bowed heads when Cliff and Crick get to the bridge.  Newley says they have to lift now and save the ones they have.  They leave, and Hazar and Dorma are left with the remainders.  The Voltron force is in the crowded lounge, downcast at all the lives they've left behind.  Jeff flashes back to Sandu.  They pretty much encapsulate the entire episode.  Then Jeff flashes back to Antor, and they talk about the rugby game.  Er, football. 

Finally Steele contacts Hawkins and Newley, and there is a lot of interference.  He's still not sure they'll make it in time, and they blather about magnetic polarities and rifts and things.  Because WEP doesn't really know what they should really be talking about. 

The damage to the planet's surface is increasing.  The Explorer and her heavily-laden fleet take off.  A radar operator on the Explorer bridge gets a signal--and then they see the reinforcement fleet coming in over the horizon--last great use of that device.  The two fleet pass, and Hawkins launches the Voltron Force to help Steele evacuate the rest of the citizens.  Hazar sheds a tear at the arrival of the ships.  Then his voiceover narrates the montage of survivors boarding the reinforcements.  He continues to usher them to the new Drule homeworld and the future as the ships leave the collapsing planet.

Then we get a montage of the Voltron members as Hazar thanks them all, superimposed over the planet's destruction.  Next follow surface views of the planet bursting into flames, and various Voltron member exclaim at the sight of its collapse. 

Hawkins then tells the fleet to land the immigrants on their new planet.

Galactic Dawn

The date is February 9, 2203.  The narrator makes a rare appearance and explains where we are--Galveston military defeated, planet about to explode.  Then Patty sees Teles in the crowd at Dairugger's feet, and Teles surrenders.

Survivors are gathered in the ruined center of the city.  In a building, Aki introduces himself to Teles.  Teles asks them to forgive the Drule citizens.  Then Tes arrives ad asks to see Asimov.  Aki realizes the two are father and son.  Outside, an Earthquake dumps debris on the survivors.  Aki orders Patty to take him to see Asimov.  Aki says they'll evacuate what they have, but they have few ships left in the fleet.  The tremors then worsen, and magma spouts out of a vent.

The Allied fleet awaits in an open area under the surface.  Asimov and Ise decide that they will use the soon-to-arrive reinforcement fleet to evacuate the Galveston people. but conditions aren't allowing them to make contact.

Patty brings Tes to speak to Asimov, and he drops to his knees before the Earth Alliance Commander.  Asimov vows that they will evacuate what they can with what they've got, and that there is a reinforcement fleet on the way.  Ise orders the ships to land and begin taking on civilians.  Meanwhile, panic is beginning as the crumbling planet starts claiming more lives.  Teles urges them to to start the evacuation.  Then Kai jumps out of his mecha and says they will start the evacuation at launch station three.  Sirk, Teles, and the Rugger mecha lead the way for millions of Galveston citizens.  The crews of the ships have prepared boarding ladders and ramps, and see the mass of aproaching Galvestons.

Aboard the Rugger Guard, Asimov tells Tes that he will consult the Alliance and urge them to migrate the Galveston people to the 3rd planet.

Women and children are boarding foirst.  The Rugger team members assist the people in getting on the massive elevators.  There is some unrest as men fear getting left behind.  Aki and Sirk see Teles looking happy for the first time.  But two young Drule officers are in the crowd with knives.

On the surface, magma vents claim wreckage.  People are packed into the ships wherever there is space.  Kirigas and others serve food to the survivors.

On the bridge, they can't raise the reinforcement fleet and Dr. Search says they have only a little more that five hours.

In space, Dewa is leading the support fleet, and they cannot raise Ise, and don't know if they've lost or won the battle or been killed in the progressive collapse of the Galveston homeworld.

The Rugger team is forced to stop boarding the ships.  Teles and Sirk are with the remaining Galveston people.  On the Rugger Guard bridge, Ise and Aki wait with bowed heads.  Keats and Walter arrive and demand to know why they've stopped boarding.  Then Asimov appears on the viewer and tells them they have to launch.  Panic ensues among the Glaveston survivors.

The fleet lifts out of the underground area and begins to launch--when they see the reinforcement fleet coming over the horizon.  Ise updates Dewa on the situation, and Mutsu sees the fleet and begins a celebration among the Rugger team members.  Ise orders the Rugger teams to launch and assist in loading the rest of the citizens.  The Glaveston people are overjoyed as the reinforcements enter the underground launch complex, and Teles sheds a tear.

Teles watches the evacuation, then walks away to be alone for a time.  He sees three men in the shadow of wreckage, and tells them that they must evacuate.  He approaches them, and they draw knives and stab him.

Sirk is overseeing the final boarding of the Galveston survivors, and realizes Teles isn't with the rest.  The traitors (one of whom is the brother of Sim) blame the war ouncil for the fighting and the destruction of Galveston, and swear they won't let him leave.  Teles doesn't blame them, and urges them to reach a ship.  They vow to stay and share the planet's fate if it means accepting Earth's pity.  Teles lurches to his feet and commands them to rebuild Galveston.  The three conspirators flee to the ships.

Sirk and a former guerrilla can't find Teles.  Then Sirk sees his body.  Walter and Aki see Sirk running, and the planet begins to collapse around her.  She comes upon his body.  Aki tries to comfort her with the fact that he lives on in the hearts of . . .  blah blah blah.  Aki lays the good luck charm he got from Kaga many episodes ago at Teles' head, and they leave him to be cremated with his planet.

The Rugger team members leave the planet with their fleet just as it collapses.  There is silence (NO NARRATION!!!) as the planet finally collapses to an absolutely awesome piano-and-orchestra rendition of the Dairugger theme.  The planet disintegrates and swallows Teles in flame. 

That was a somber, bittersweet ending.  When I first got the Vehicle Voltron DVDs, I watched this with my girlfriend and another friend of ours (who happens to be my contraband-unlicensed-in-the-us anime supplier--that's how I saw Ideon and all the post Macross Plus Macross series).  We finished this, and then Monica asked about "that team-up epsisode."  So I got Fleet of Doom and we watched that.  Yep, I think that's a shark in Voltron's wake.  Good gravy, is that a shit in tone compared to even the Voltron dub of these last few episodes.  I think the movie and the following "second season" of Lion Voltron are clear departures from what made Voltron stand out next to G.I Joe, He-Man, Transformers, and the other American-made series of the time.

Even though there are no corresponding Japanese episodes to compare these ones with, I'm going to watch them anyone.  Look forward to it!